sexting on a treadmill. speed 9.0 beat that slut!
Id like to know where dora the explorers parents are when she goes on all these crazy ass adventures
I popped a zit on your vagina. Don't say I never loved you.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We're knee deep in HJ's right now.
I'm not proud of how I threatened that 8 year old during drunken laser tag
Tomorrow's thirsty thursday is now sponsored by the three time champion, chemisty failure. celebration starts asap.
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We literally solved our fight using cat pictures on Instagram. True love.
He called me saying he got nice rims for his car so now we can fuck in style
Drug test isn't today. Now I'm just sitting in this orientation with a bag of your piss in my pants
not sure if actually covered in glitter or just drunk
I just threw up into a baby carriage. There was a baby in it.
This is a friendly reminder to try not to shit on the toilet seat. If our 4 year old can manage it, I think you can too.
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