it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
just printed 333 ways to get kicked out of wal-mart. hello thursday night.
i'm naked playing bejeweled blitz in your bed. this is both a forewarning and an apology
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you stole their roomba and ran out the door so that you could 'set it free'.
we found you passed out on lawn and the roomba bouncing back and forth on the sidewalk.
you kept saying 'its nothing a six pack wont fix' as they loaded you into the ambulance.
she uses eco-friendly sex toys. she is the literal definition of a hippie.
We thought you were crowd-surfing until we realized it was the bouncers throwing you out
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
what part of 'taking a night off' includes MDMA in your world?
My professor laid down on the floor and told us a story that involved being naked covered in Vaseline with a pumpkin on your head. No lie. This is going to be a great semester.
Any story that involves the words "bloody hand job" and/or "sliced penis" is bound to be a good one, right?
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
I think I fell asleep on the dance floor at one point...but played it off cool and acted like I just did the robot.
dude you pointed at my dad's crotch and said I'd tap that. I didn't even know you were gay.
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