and that's why we call him explosion in my pants. no one remembers his real name.
So we were sitting in his back seat and he asked me if I practiced giving head. I mean really, who asks that?
I forgot how hot balto sounded
Just realized the hot girl at the office got a boob job over the Holiday.....she is now super-hot girl.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
since i spend so many of my nights sleeping on the bathroom floor i think im going to remove all toiletries from under my sink and replace them with a pillow and blanket.
He deserves to hear about your Vagina Shrooms
Walk of Shame today included voting.
He said you stopped mid-fuck, called fives on his dick, walked out to grab another drink, and came back.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thats alot of pressure.
Just on your vagina. BTW I'm passing your house.
Is this the guy that did shots off my ass at the beach? Haha
I woke up with my name tag for work still on my shirt. It was a rough night.
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I caught a glimpse of his penis. I can only imagine what your mom's vagina goes through because of that penis
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
Randomize