I thought we agreed I wasn't a screamer?
I mean I like that it's warm enough to open the windows, but it annoys me that I can't walk around naked anymore.
When i look at that picture of him, i'm a little proud to be like yeah, his dick was in my mouth saturday no big deal.
For some reason I have a hard time believing getting drunk and recreating a movie about singing transvestites is ever very far from a situation you're in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm sorry I compared your vagina to nascar
She said I told her "I'm to drunk to take your bra off." then she said I walked out completely naked to go watch tv.
I'm just so happy. I go to sleep and when I wake up there will be chocolate milk and penis.
Your stories are the best. I feel like you're a spy among the heteros. It's not fair.
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I just realized I haven't got laid since the last time the Browns won.
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Everyone thinks I'm sleeping but I'm actually just melting.
She made me a smoothie in the morning.. It was vodka and fruit.
Just met my future wife. Please dont fuck her.
Drinking is such a hassle. I wish I could just press a button and be drunk.
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