im pretty sure vibrators are the best invention since dinosaur chicken nuggets
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
just bought a 30 and sold it for $2 a can to some dumb ass high school kids. now lets buy two and get really drunk
The twins are whispering in turkish together. I think I did something bad last night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You screamed for campus security to do something about the police officer who dumping ur 40
booty call birthday vouchers, best idea ever. it's like giving a present to myself for someone else's birthday.
I mean, I'm twenty four years old and I've never paid for my own drink. You can't say that any of your ex girlfriends boobs are THAT great.
I guess, all I remember was giving you road head the whole way there so you wouldn't fall asleep.
I greatly enjoy being related to her. Even if is it only by a penis.
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Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so, i guess i gotta chill on showing up to work hungover... someone anonymously left a bible in my work mailbox (no one else got one)
I need all the beers. I want to be holding on to the grass so I don't fall off the earth drunk.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
I don't trust him but hanging out with him might be fun
he's literally satan but yeah probably
I'm disproportionately drunk. But I also spelled disproportionately right twice so maybe I'm not that drunk
Dude. I just got a visual of u climbing over a bathroom stall to save my life.
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