I realize that when i start making 24-themed music videos in my head to the song 'love is a battlefield' that i really need to get out more
why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
I haven't been this sober since birth.
The lesbians are drunkenly meowing in the hallway again. This is the shit I'll miss at home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he let me wear his jacket and there was a magnum and a bowl in his pocket ... I think im in love
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
There is a visibable outline from you in the grass. its you in the fetal position...
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
WHEN DID YOU SAY YOU COME BACK BC I GOT INVITED TO A KEG WAR PARTY
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
he spent an hour trying to rescue a bug from the sink. turned out to be a sesame seed.
YOU DESERVE A GUY WITH A NORMAL DICK DONT SETTLE FOR ANYTHING LESS
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
Im wearing black today mourning the orgasm i couldn't get this morning :(
But like it was sooo bad! At one point he tried to flip me over and he fell off the bed
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