you yelled then hung up at the girl on information bc she could not pinpoint your location and tell you how to get to dennys
Signed everyone in my dorm up for free samples of astroglyde. Took me an hour. Happy new years!!!!!
it was such a weird mix, KFC and penis
Its important to me that you know there is a tambourine down my pants.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
When the question of, do you know who's ass has been on the cake you are eating is said... Good or bad party?
How do you feel? I threw up in a towel. Also, a lot of other things.
Why am I feeling up grandma?!
I'm really glad a picture of you as an infant followed this text.
Lock the bathroom door next time you are going to masterbate with the shower head, okay?
I was just power-washing my vagina.
She wanted a dick pic so I sent her brett Favres dick pic then she asked why I have pictures of old men's beautiful dicks
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I HAVE 5 FELTING NEEDLES AND THEYRE GOING DIRECTLY INTO YOUR EYES IF YOU POST THAT SHIT
He wanted to save my dignity, I just wanted beads and jäger
You know you've hit a new slutty low when you're simultaneously sexting and having a tea party with a 4 year old
Video on mandys page of you drinking upside down was finally put up...too bad all the comments were about me and him fighting in the background while he screamed "BLOW BIG BETSY!'
No but seriously. Just had a guy lean over and sniff my head like it was a freshly baked pie
Really should've known 2020 was gonna suck when the guy dressed as baby new year got arrested at our party 5 past midnight...
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