So i looked up from her cooch and there was her ex-boyfriend
Awkward
So you coming over for some grilled cheese and head?
did you violate me with a mr sketch marker when i passed out? i just peed and wiped purple and it smelled like grape. i need to get to the bottom of this...
he said i took off my shirt and wrote "help HATI" on my tits, and charged people to motorboat me..... i'd like to say i woke up with 267$ in my purse
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
I woke on the floor next to a big TV. Apparently I traded my bed for a 52 inch samsung and a box of pop tarts.
I hope, cuz I was gunna get "celebritory drunk" but now I have to get "I'm disappointed drunk"
the fda needs to get their shit together cause these four loko going away parties are gonna kill me
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope the dean has a raincoat on because I'm prolly gonna throw up on him when I get my degree
she tried to handfeed me fritos while yelling "PENIS TRAIN"
At what point in my life did a night that has strippers, belly dancers, tequila and a midget become "average"?
He claimed he was the best ass eater of the south. He was right.
I like to oil my gears with cheap vodka and strangers
I pack a first-aid kit when I DD for you. What does that tell you about your partying? For what I see and do, paying my food and gas for the night is a goddamn BARGAIN.
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