worst morning ever. completed my walk of shame home to find my parents, grandma, and priest had come down to surprise me on my birthday. now i'm in the car with them to go get my car from the bar.
I just named my vagina "The Boneyard"
More like "Chia Pet"
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I just fell down the stairs in the library and further deviated my septum. That's why I don't study.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
...She was shooting whiskey using a turkey baster...i was horrified.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
They wear helmets and mouth pieces when they drink...u down?
We've only been here for 15 hours and our names are already on 2 separate police reports. We've also been given our "final warning" by the cops and hotel management.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He showed me his night stand drawer...it has one too many sex things in it.
Exactly how many...is TOO many?
He balanced a treat on his nose, and then he rolled me a joint. My bf is the best pet ever.
Her hookup left his underwear and shorts in the dorm last night... What he was wearing when he left, we may never know.
I sense naked hashbrown eating in my near future.
I just watched some kid bang his girlfriend and I was like whatever I'll just sit here and do all your fucking drugs that's fine
I'm glad you enjoyed the night but why were you calling me "daddy"?
Randomize