She wants an explanation of my cousins creepy foot fetish with my god sister. i don't know how I can sum this up in a text.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
But I just had this pork pâté. It was dick grabbing.
At orientation, some girl is asking, loudly, where she can get weed. Everyone looks discussed but are paying very close attention to people's answers.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
I passed out and slept in my car. Now I feel like a hungover zoo animal. Look and laugh people, look and laugh.
Debating going to the grocery store with my vibrator still in, cause I can't stand the idea of it out. Lets do some risk/reward
i hate going to her parties because i always know everyone there which means everyone knows my ex which means i wont get laid
Oh my god I found my bf's erotica
OH MY GOD HE WROTE THIS EROTICA.
OH MY GOD THIS IS GOOD EROTICA.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
Floor bacon is actually really good
He nailed that bed down really well so it won't break again. All I could think while he was nailing it was "challenge accepted".
I had Mac n cheese made with weed butter last night. Epic
So naked ping pong was a mistake... Looks like we were attacked by an octopus.
I Projectile vomited a massive question mark on Brent's bedroom wall. Don't tell him it was me. I want him to play the whodunit game.
Randomize