It's never good when you wake up covered with burns
She kept chasing him yelling thief, because he drank some of her drink. That was at 8, it got worse.
Just called the bar: "hi this is the girl who you kicked out for excessive bleeding, do you happen to have my coat?"
My neighbor just watched me eat a granola bar without pants, this is a whole new level of unemployed
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please don't drown this weekend. It would be a shame to lose a dick like yours.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
The liquor store was handing out free shots of some new expensive vodka, but they caught on the fourth time we came back in different outfits. Politics.
I just spend twenty minutes scrubing the "Happy Birthday" off of my vagina. He's never gonna forget this.
I hope you realize that its not me making that decision, but rather the combination of my genitals and sexual orientation
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I dropped my keys into the toaster and felt it push down as I pulled them out. Couldn't stop thinking it was a bad idea the whole time.
I still don't know how you've lived this long.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Gonna play a drinking game called drink til I feel my emotions. The things I do so I can be a therapist
Ya it was crazy the power went just as she was about orgasm and the vibrator got fried with the power surge
she's my really slutty friend i bring around so i can act slutty and not feel as bad about it
I'm at her wedding and she managed to get every single one night stand I ever had in her wedding party. Why does she hate me?
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