Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
there is no way i'm buying plan b and condoms at the same time
no do it! it shows that you acknowledge your mistakes and you are proactively working towards a solution.
It seems to me that once you begin comparing Jesus to hercules and calling him a super pimp you should put the wine away...
We need you. We already made it on global news and are drunk at the election party.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I inspected his penis with a mini flashlight to check for visible stds...he was clean
wait, how does the 20 year old one night stand pregnant girl have a superiority complex?
I realize it truly is impossible to burrow under the grass like a mole. Let's not drink for at least another 3 days.
I ran into a hotel and told the doorman he was doing a great job. That was before you cried on my jacket.
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
sometimes it's just necessary to be your own gyno when you're too afraid to tell your mom about your real life
I used his number to look up his customer information at work. He's no longer saved as Magic Penis in my phone.
You know you had a good night when your wearing you best friends pants to work the next day
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
So if my boyfriend and I hooked up with the same girl it’s not like I cheated. It’s communal.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
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