Lets date for the summer
what?
Dont love me in September.
spencer pratt says his family invinted chess
that kid is like the al gore of hollywood.
I'm wearing this super skanky ass dress that's wayyy to slutty for church but I think Jesus will appreciate it because i look so bangin for his bday.
All I had with a note saying that my shoes are in the ceiling and good luck.
Liver, I have supported you for 18 fucking years. Pull your weight for ONE NIGHT and detoxify this alcohol.
second roommate of the year to get clamydia. go life.
I just watched how this is made for an hour because I was tooo high to remember what they were making. it was like a prize at the end.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
Guess what I'm doing tonight? Tacos and strip chess.
Seriously I am not buying you condoms anymore. You're 22, if you aren't woman enough to buy them yourself then you don't deserve orgasms. Grow some tits.
We have a lot of substance abuse to do tomorrow its sleep time
I appreciate that you take the time to fix your typos even while masturbating
When you're trying to sneak from the bathroom to your room with dildo, but it glows in the dark and suddenly your entire life is illuminated in the shape of dick
I've covered myself in body paint in the likeness of R2D2 and I still didn't get laid. Please explain.
I tried to bring you in when you passed out on the porch but all you said was that I "ruined your hope ands dreams of becoming an astronaut"
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