You look like a girl that would like strip clubs
I am literally too baked to press the call button. How am I supposed to bone him?
I just told you I can't. My fingers are melting. I have discovered the high.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He was more tolerable with alcohol in my system. I woke up to him squeezing me and telling me how he wanted to dip me in strawberry jam.
I just walked in on my lesbian roommate having sex in the kitchen, and it was awesome. We proceeded to shots naked together. Happy birthday to me.
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
I just went to add a song I had never heard before to my "high as fuck" playlist and it was already there.
sweating bourbon at client mtg -- you?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
She doesn't believe I only want to use you for sex. She has a much higher opinion of me than either of us do.
I couldn't really understand you because you were really quiet and I said "I don't know what you're saying, it's kind of a big mumble" and you said "that sums up my life"
Usually it's tequila, or vodka. But today was just the devil
Don't do him, he's a Dolphins fan! A FUCKING DOLPHINS FAN!
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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