Someone told me they could tell we were from cincinnati because we say "as fuck" after adjectives
Me= Watching Ferngully. My neighbor= Having really loud sex including multiple orgasms
Oh God
I know, but the worst part is I'm not really sure which I'd rather be doing. Feel free to re-evaluate our friendship
I slept walked to the toilet and woke up pooping. Easily one of the most disorienting events of my life.
I just spent the last 30 minutes shaving my asshole.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You probably havent been upstairs if you think that the microwave missing its door is bad
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
He was wearing his Class of 2007 shirt so I sat there for 5 minutes and read all the names of the guys I can remember giving head to.
Oh my god my life; so much cake and so little sex
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think being a buddhist has made me a better drunk
You missed practice last night. You owe at least 8 hours of liver sprints.
He might have if you were a little more subtle about your feelings instead of telling everyone multiple times how much you wanted his dick
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
By the time the opening band finished, she was already slurring, coming on to the gay couple next to us, and waving her panties in the air.
I said no to friends with benefits because it was too much commitment
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