Di me a solid and hit me with your car.
Is there any way you can check to see if I have a warrant out in Alabama?
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
i think he drugged the pie. i'll get back to you on that later.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
he walkred up to the manager at dennys and said 'look, my friends passed out in your bathroom, can i go get her?'
is it possible i asked you to give me a preliminary pap smear?
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Well you were hungry, by then you cried and called yourself a basic bitch for eating crackers
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I called you a cum goblin in my voicemail. I stand by it.
My boobs are literally freaking out because I've been wearing a bra for more than three hours....I need to go out more...
It's Scottsdale, it shouldn't be this hard to find drugs.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I'm in his bed with no pants on and he's just eating a sloppy joe
I had the choice between 9 burritos and 1 girl...
And...?
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