i just went dwnstairs and there are 5 guys without their shirts on hugging each other. i think i should leave now
i hope the fucking fire crotch burns his mouth
I'm seriously so bored I'm seeing how many rooms I can masturbate in before I get caught.
Four. Poor grandma...
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Just in case you were wondering I sent you a text at 4:37 in the morning because I woke up on the side of the highway at that time
No. No. And hell no. If you are driving a Honda Fit you are not allowed to give me a dirty look. No.
I couldn't get past the raccoon on my porch so i slept on my lawn.
He came over apologized for his lack of sexual skills. Cleaned my kitchen cooked me dinner. And gave me another one minute stand. I think im okay with this
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Your cock has been in the back of my throat. Co-worker is no longer a sufficient title. Fix that shit ASAP
You didnt text me.. I'm on your street with golf clubs
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
She started waving a nerf rifle around and demanding free booze.
I told you that we shouldn't have sex. You said "its okay I already saw you pee" apparently that was convincing
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