is it bad if I use the term bowl as a measurement of time, as in how long it takes to smoke a bowl?
today i learned why jack sparrow loved rum so fucking much
Right now im sitting at home and all i can think about is im eating calories and i should be out drinking them.
The bathroom is trashed. Someone took down all the rings of the shower curtain and Scott threw up on the curtain liner. All the soap and shampoo is in the guest bedroom and the lightbulbs are in a drawer. And there are vom footprints.
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Dude that musta been some handjob last night. The sound of her pandora bracelet kept waking me up
Cops busted the party. A kid dressed as a dinosaur tried to crawl out the bathroom window but his tail got stuck. It took 3 cops to pry him out.
New low: falling asleep with my face in the toilet only to be awoken when my hand slid down and touched the water. It's moments like these I wish I could forget.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
My god this is going to ruin whatever Vegas left of our souls...
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This stranger told me I should "start playing for the other team" and then continued to talk to me about the joys of being a lesbian
All i really remember is meeting this guy dressed as jesus and i kept taking his wine and saying "the body of christ!"
I also woke up in my friends room to 3 girls and a naked boy on the floor but thats besides the point
Definitely just threw up in a mcds cup going through Wendy's drive thru. I'm way to hungover to go to work today
The only person more miserably hungover from the party is the dog, and that's because he ate some balloons
Im pretty sure breakfast wine is a thing, and if it isn't, I just invented it
I lost my virginity to Adventure Time. DO YOU NOT UNDERSTAND THE SIGNIFICANCE?!
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