honey bunches of taint.
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
How do you get mayonnaise out of... well jesus it's everywhere, let's start with carpets
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Taking shot for every red box on your worst bracket. I have 30. I might die tonight.
I wish there were birth control emojis
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
There just aren't enough words in the English language to convey my deep and abiding love of your cock. So I am beefing up on my Portuguese.
My wife ladies and gentlemen! Love ya babe.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
jut tell him gently that you'd rather spend more time with his dick than his face
i wear a size 32DD bra. its basically impossible for me to get a speeding ticket
Gonna be hard to top last New Year's Eve when the guy I blew came at midnight
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
you smell like vanilla and daddy issues
Dude you where on that lil kids bike at 2 am ridin down the turning lane wearing only socks and a helmet singing born to be wild, no you weren't that fucked up
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