we're taking shots every time my dog licks his penis. we're on number 8 now.
you should have been aborted.
I just found blacked-out interviews on my voice recorder. Go journalism.
We don't have a ruler. Come downstairs and lay in the snow with a boner so we can see how much snow we've gotten. Put your 8 inches to a less shameful use.
You were crying and asking his mom "why doesn't he like road head?"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Plans for halloween need to outrank Caesar, Cleopatra and Mark Antony's threesome...just saying
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
He drew a bath for me. It was only cute until he started throwing in celery and calling me soup.
This ER has an aquarium in it!!!
Hot Italian guy literally came into my logic class just to get my number to study with me and left. America.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
ARE YOU THINKING VAGINA THEMED RESTAURANT
The number of tpain songs that actually relate to my life right now is embarrassing.
You kept chewing on the empty milk carton and saying "kitty" over and over again. It was an interesting night.
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
I can't believe the police had to bring me to my booty call last night
It's not my fault, Tequila turned all my alarms off.
Randomize