I need to stop hooking up with boys in my major. three boys in one class is just a litttle too awkward.
Wow anytime a scalper has i need tix written on the back of a franzia box thats a trusted seller
I use him for alcohol and he uses me for sex. This is the closest thing to love i could imagine
You know, I had the money for a pregnancy test, but at the time, tacos were more important.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He just asked me to pee through my panties while he watched. I might need more tequila for this one.
I hate when people see you passed out in your front yard and call 911. Like what, you can't take a nap face down on your steps at 4pm?
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
Since he's sober and out of jail, he acts like we are the worst people on Earth. Fuck him, the only acceptable time in life to do coke is the early twenties. He won't take that from us.
How can I explain how nice he is to you? ...like, I'm going to have to have my world famous why being a douche is sexy talk.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
I think having a vagina should be considered a skill, give me a break.
Well I guess I'll go shower now and wash all the stripper off.
They weren't kidding when they said "Go Army Strong." Best sex I ever had.
I told him to not try to hang out with me ever again and now I regret it Bc im bleeding through my uterus and just want him to suck on my aching nipples
Wow this just keeps getting better, weed, shrooms, a stripper..........a gun.
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