It was like a spaceship landed and 1000s of hipsters filled up the park
You tried to get the stranger on the sea bus to give you a bite of his chicken sub by repeating over and over "im in a girl band"
You refused to come over and kept yelling that you were gonna sleep on a car
Make sure to show her the sewer we were arrested in on your tour.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Theres was an instant understanding between us being drunk on the trampoline at four in the morning and the people walking down the road at the same time
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
New justification for blow: drug week; 'how it's made'
He should get nipple rings. No homo...I actually don't think there is a way to make it non gay.
Yeah you should have just let that thought go.
Yea. I couldn't get a job in fast food but I can teach Americas youth. The future looks great
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
You gotta buy me dinner first. Or smoke me out. Both are equally chivalrous
Like we were literally doing coke off his insulin pump
This bowl is so big, I just said out loud, "I'm going to die here" as I blew smoke out the cat door. Merry fucking Christmas.
Did I tell you about the swingers? Because I think they're trying to trap me.
We're hate flirting, damnit.
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