Farted during a conference call.SBD. permeated the room people were gonna puke.noone could say anything or leave cus we were on the phone with clients. coworkers were outraged.how I still have a job is beyond me.
He invited you over for Super Sexy Saturday and Cosmos... I'm pretty sure that's gay
How did the whale quest end up? I saw u hit a little snag when the first one heard you call her that.
Sorry really high. We have no lighter so we're lighting the bowl with rolled up paper towels lit by candle which also lit with a rolled up paper towel that we lit with the stove eye
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
some bitch filled my sink with salsa.
on the way home I asked you what exit we get off at and your answer was "just like the goldfish"
He broke hus nose arm jousting with the traffic cones... We need to make head shots illegal or get helmets or something
He's grinding topless with a group of girls to that discovery channel song. May I take a message?
Just found my socks folded and in the back pocket of my jeans. Apparently drunk me refuses to lose shit after the panties incident over New Years.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was sleeping pretty good until your cat pooped loudly. I dreamed that a full grown man was pooping on my ear. It startled me.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
I just sneezed and margarita mix and ash came out of my nose. I love jersey
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
She can be as judgemental as she wants. But she thinks the female orgasm is a myth so who is really winning here...
You waddled all the way home with your shoes in a construction cone. I'm glad to call you my Bestfriend.
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