yo dibs on the gosselin haired one.
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I puked in the urinal of a bar tonight. Not embarrassed cause I got away with it, legitimately upset you weren't there to make fun of me.
crossed #23 off the Slucket List!
YOU JUST MADE YOUR SLUCKET LIST THIS MORNING.
Either sorry for fondling you Saturday or thank you for letting me fondle you Saturday.
some dude just accurately guessed my height and bra size.. that is cup AND inches around. creepy, yet impressive
If I spent my amateur stripper money does that mean I am cleansed of my sins?
So much Jack, so little girl.
Sexual favors are the only currency recognized by the Republic of Greg
THIS IS THE 11TH FUCKING COFFEE TABLE THAT YOU AND RICHARD CRASHED THROUGH.
I'm surprised me and Richard survived 11 of your coffee tables.
YOU TWO ARE BUYING ME A NEW ONE I AM PISSED.
Apparently swingers are magnetically drawn to me?
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
He loves blowjobs.. were meant for each other.
I guess I’m only into threesomes at Halloween, because I just woke up next to “Marilyn Monroe” and “Joe DiMaggio” in their condo
Randomize