It was kind of weird
What did your mom walk in?
She flung her tampon across the room.
Just got my econometrics book in the mail and started flipping through it. Our Thursday parties may turn into u convincing me not to kill myself.
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
dude all my bootycalls are going to Eclipse tonight... Do I really want it that bad?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
CHAZ BONO WILL BE ON THE NEXT SEASON OF DANCING WITH THE STARS.
Internet Is back!
MY NEWS TRUMPS YOURS.
there's chocolate cake in my bathtub.. I don't even want to know how the hell chocolate cake wound up in my tub..
Normally this is when girls give blow jobs. That's how you mentally condition them to put up with PMSing, because they see the shinny blowjob light at the end of the tunnel.
Don't use or open the microwave. It's full of smoke. Buying a new one tomorrow, will explain.
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
She's like a solid nine. Well maybe not a tomorrow morning nine, but she's a nine right now and trying to take me home.
All I remember is grabbing a random guys dick at the bar and him just saying thank you and us taking a shot together
I'm feeding a baby and swiping on tinder...what has my life come to?!?!
Dude. $3 Jack n Cokes AND Cheesesticks... Find me tomorrow plz
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
I’ve developed a strange interest in ear wax removal vids on YouTube. Dear god, I need to get a job
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