he was wearing sponge bob boxers. Guess how long he lasted.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
FYI: Do not ever call any girl a thundercunt as a form of dirty talk.
She tried to keep her legs crossed last night while doing a keg stand. Way to keep it classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just put a funnel in my mouth and pour the tequila in with a little emergen-c
she is using a fork to eat popcorn and refuses to drink gatorade out of anything but a margarita glass... did i mention the popcorn is on a plate?
Woke up to a huge puddle of water in the living room floor, apparently I made an indoor snowman.
Looking for the remote in the couch. Finding Adderall beads. Considering utilizing.
Random question, but did I leave a spoon on your dresser last night?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
I went to the bar without a bra on pretty sure you can go to Taco Bell drive thru with no pants
But actually he solved 40% of my life problems just in one dicking
I think my moral compass just broke
Just hit on a girl with the line, "You look like Natalie Portman if she did drugs". Strike 1
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
Randomize