nosebleed girl is getting lots of praise
he got wood on it!
i know. i had to sit in his lap on the plane. he also wore teva sandals.
...i was talking about hockey
I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
I feel like I've been hit by a train. I woke up this morning covered in wine, free condoms, and a sign language dictionary.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It's called penis withdraw. Or alcoholism. I get them confused these days.
You ever get that 6th sense feeling in your dick like you know its gonna get sucked later?
sitting on my lesbian neighbors couch, sexting, & eating a burrito.. that single
literally overdrew my bank account at 3 in the morning to eat subway with 7 sherriffs.
I think I collapsed a disk in my spine when I drunkenly lifted that fat girl on my shoulders to chicken fight at the pool.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You told the cop FUCK YOU AND YOUR TASER, i dont think he appricaited that
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
This guy is selling weed on the train. Like... Straight up. No fucks given.
I just woke up in the closet wearing nothing but a Santa hat.
All i want from a relationship is to get drunk watch pirates of the Caribbean and have sex
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