Only in college do people pre-game a meteor shower
i just wanna lock my vagina in a safe filled with bandaids and healthy things
I wouldn't take my shot so you poured it on my face. Twice.
Don't try to dry clothes in the microwave. They'll catch on fire.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Why is there blood and lettuce everywhere?
I know I should be focused on nurturing their bright little minds but it's 10 a.m. and I need a cock in my mouth
I dont know, but the way you were flopping around and gurgling made me scared that you were actually drowning in the carpet.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come now. I'm bloody but I'll give you the best fuck of your life.
It was only funny because some guy across the street was getting his mail and he just stopped and watched me throw up everywhere
I'm dedicating this beer to drunk texting
we got cupcakes after we fucked. gives a whole new meaning to sugar daddy
Drunk you decided to patrol campus as the Arrow and tell random bystanders "YOU HAVE FAILED THIS CAMPUS." Campus P.D. did not join your crusade.
That explains the nerd bow & arrow...
I come home to my brother mixing skittles and vodka. We're all proud of him.
Randomize