I'm at a party with that guy you made out with on new years. He remembers your name!
My workout was carrying 2 cases home from the grocery. It's Bowl Week.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
Judging by his buldge, this guy is huge. just paid steve to follow him into the bathroom and find out. They had a convo about it.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i seriously have like 9 pictures of people taking shots out of a vag on my camera....
I have been sober for so long that I miss hangovers... what is happening to this summer?
Somehow it went from suicide to pierced nipples. I think we're good.
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Remember how he wouldn't sleep with me "out of respect"? Well, Mr. Respect just fingered me in a parking garage.
17. The number of times my one night stand told me he loved me.
You're never the same once you're dry humped on the frat house floor
My vagina doesn't have a refer a friend program. You don't get $25 for getting your friend to have sex with me.
You know something is wrong with your life when your mom is at the bar getting free tequila shots and you aren't
How is it that 364 days a year I'm the adult, but on Halloween you completely forget how to have fun and become my grandma?
Randomize