Come over! I've just turned Titanic into a drinking game. I drink every time I want to fuck Leonardo DiCaprio.
I want a gay best friend. or apple sauce either one is fine with me
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
i can't believe you just compared my dick to leprosy
Just heard the words 'Pussy Riot' on NPR...I almost crashed my car.
IT WAS SO BIG. I FORGOT GOD MADE THEM LIKE THIS.
I was at a bus stop, eating a load of bread. Fairly sure I'm the poster child for poor students.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
so I'm staring at this cat and wondering..is the tail of the cat the derivative of it's head?
stop getting stoned after studying for a calc final.
Meant to have fun, ended up giving speech about consent to guy at bar. Feminist side feels happy. Orgasms side feels confused and betrayed.
I would sacrifice a finger for two more hours of sleep.
she keeps a switchblade in her panty drawer... i am both terrified and slightly turned on
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
Its nights like last night that make me want to high five my liver.
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