i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.
You never realize how many sex toys you have until you have to strategically hide them while moving out of your dorm.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just want you to know that i just realized your the only friend i dont feel fat around.
i am too hungover to go to class can you just call me and put it on speaker phone
apparently it's a turnoff if you ask a guy why he thinks he needs to use magnums
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Sent nudes to my best friend's boyfriend and mom last night. So I'm coping with that on top of my hangover this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's not even 11, i dropped a shot glass, nick is bleeding, and everyone is drunk
Let's be honest I'm gonna watch murder she wrote and eat taquitos at three am
Drunk packed a lunch. Made two turkey sandwiches and threw in a bag of raw bacon. Gold star for the day drunk self.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
he's trapped himself under a bed and is screaming at a robot dog to give him a blowjob
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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