Do you know that poor pathetic girl that we should be friends with
I am looking at the epitome of fake boobs right now
brass monkey on radio. cant stop dancing.
I'm taking last night back. It officially didn't happen. Tell your friends.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
just ran into my gynecologist at the liquor store... i think she's found the source of my problems
Apparently as I was doing the walk of shame home my dad's date was on her way to hers. hoes come in all ages these days
Hey man, sorry I chased you around the house with a small table.
In one night, this kid threw a firecracker under a fucking cop car, crashed three seperate parties, and passed out in a tree in our backyard. Do you even know who he is?
His car is rigged up like the cash cab how am i supposed to not sleep with him
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Thank you, I really appreciate that. I know I couldn't participate in class tonight and I hope that doesn't affect my grade too much. So please let me know of any extra credit opportunities such as fellatio
I thought my neighbors locked me out of the building. Then I remembered I was drunk. PUSH AND TURN.
Observations from Vegas: #1. Strippers pasties pose a choking hazard. #2. Best. Heimlich. Ever.
My moral compass kept pointing to his penis.
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
Is it uncouth to masturbate the night before a gyno appointment?
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