We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
Almost propositioned sex in exchange for a study guide for my final tomorrow.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
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Dude id rather jerk off w a fist full of bee's than deal with that girl that never stops talking.
I'm stealing this baby.
Well I always support illegal activity but where would you put it?
They're basically the Kennedys. This is the family I fucked in to. I'm so proud of my vagina as much as it feels shitty for my heart.
Dear me: Drinking & crying tonight, my place, 9pm sharp. Love, your life
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
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It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
He sent me a snapchat of himself growing a double chin. I think we're past the stage where there's any risk of us sleeping together. Ever.
I added a U.S. Senator on snapchat....casual.
Idk what the interview would be like but I imagine you in a suit and tie surveying a nervous freshman and eventually leading him into a labyrinth of debauchery and clapping him on the back, saying "welcome to the fraternity, son"
Well. At least he's a gentleman. A gentleman satanist.
I preemptively put on a cape before eating a bunch of weed brownies. Best decision ever.
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