lesson #67 learned in college: a three day old margarita, is still a margarita.
Nick had a break down & said to me "Everybody's mad at me, I'm the douchebag, Im the fucking douchebag that everyone hates, Do you wanna come home with this douchebag?!"
You're going home with him aren't you?
I'll see ya in the morning when I leave his house
Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
My cousin's dog just exhaled smoke. My job here is done.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
90 persent of me said don't pee on that fake plant. Buyt i did
Oh god I think I promised some guy from high school that I'd be his fuck buddy in like 3 months
I have invented a new sport: freshman-watching. I'm sitting on our porch literally dying watching the freshmen run around trying to find parties
How do I tell my child he was conceived on a barstool in South Alabama?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
after further investigation i found out he's a little bit married..
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
Her tramp stamp said call me maybe. You should have run for the nearest decontamination shower immediately.
Giiirrrllll. Back to back snaps of dicks. Two different guys sent me their dick at the same time. This is totally what our founding fathers meant with life, liberty, and the pursuit of happiness.
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