girl has like over 50 stars tattooed on her front, side and back. feels like i just fucked the universe.
you dialed the number "23" then talked to it for three minutes
Dont you think its a little early in the relationship for sexting?
well this feels familiar. awake at the crack of dawn laying in the fetal position praying for the sweet release of death. i think im done with jager for a while
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we were wasted and he didn't have a condom so he called the front desk and asked for one. They didn't "officially" have them but the night manager happened to have one in his wallet. He brought it to the room with two mints.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
he said i looked like a lion with slutty lingerie on .
Do you have any need for a scary clown mask?
He was wearing an Affliction shirt, a Monster hat, and he asked me for anal within 5 minutes of meeting me. Like 3 strikes and you're out, bro.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
this is an emotional support booty call
I need ecstasy. And, before you ask, the answer is yes right now
I've talked to too many cops in one week and I haven't even committed any crimes. I hate the suburbs
Things were going really well until his cousin showed up. She told him I look kind of like his mom, which started a ten-minute debate on my and his mother's specific features, and ultimately, who is prettier. Guess who my date picked.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
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