he threw mangos from the tree he was in at people and got arrested for harassment
it's just weird having a massive boner in the morning when you could have used it the night before.
Do you think he likes his girlfriend's moustache?
I was speaking french the whole night. Until i got arrested. Then I decided I should probably start speaking English.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Are we playing "how much awkwardness can we fit in the final 29 hours of 2011"?
yes yes we are. Go do something with super glue. i don't want to win.
I truly just stopped puking in my 730 am calculus class, looked up, corrected my professor, then resumed puking my eyes out. He was both impressed and disgusted.
and everyone will high five me and girls will approach me offering blowjobs
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He is so pussy whipped she has made him change his name to Toby
I just text my one night stand Happy Easter on her way home...now would be a good time for the lord to smite me.
Wake up. Eat bread. Find your dignity. Don't be late for work again.
Lexi was drunk enough at 2pm to say "fuck tom brady and fuck you too" to literally every person at the store in Pats attire.
It's hard not to feel like a terrible person with bruises on your tits.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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