Uhh me and Jacque peed on the street outside the bar last night and wiped with flowers. I vaguely remember her repeating the word "fresh" over and over.
He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
I never thought I would get head to the lion king soundtrack
update. expensive tequila only makes the mistakes more expensive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
If I come back covered in mud topless and banging on your door, please have a warm towel ready for me
hey, this is the ginger girl from the party...i've thought about it and I wanna join the american girl drinking team
No, I am not setting up my roomba to clean up puke.
She was pretty drunk. It was like watching a puppy explore the world for the first time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm at his house right now making him pancakes to compensate for YOU not giving him a handjob last night. You're welcome.
She was blowing me when her roommate came in and goes "you want me to tap in?"
You realize once your inheritance is finalized this shit will stop happening right?
I gave him a blowjob to kill bill. 2 of my favorite things.
This dude is trying to sext and all I can think about is taco bell and their new crunch wrap sliders
See I insist I'm not a groupie and then I say things like "will bang for a backstage pass".
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
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