Come get meeee. I'm stranded in the middle of no where with Paul (?). I think u puked on his friend.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
If I've learned one thing today? Blow jobs get you to state championships.
Alright. Who did it? Who's bangin' the ump?
you just can't say no to drugs on a mirrored table.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i just set an alarm for noon. fuck yes winter break.
Don't bite the hand that gives you multiple orgasms
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
Their house warming gift for us was a half case of keystone and getting the cops called..
I just had to blow my nose on a mcdonalds receipt in my car. Its time to stop doing coke.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't want to have to force feed him my vagina!!
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
He doesn't belong with God. He belongs face-down in a pile of his own excrement, vomit, blood and semen. Then pissed on by Satan.
In case you wake up wondering why your eyes hurt... You were claiming to be Zeus and that mortal weapons couldn't harm you. Some chick took it as a challenge and pepper sprayed you. Sorry dude.
I know it must have been a hard break up. Are you okay?
Oh yeah, I'm fine dude. My vaginas heart is broken though. I feel bad for her, you should give her a call sometime.
I thought adderall would sober me up, but it did NOT.
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