I am at a bar watching a rat tail get braided.
bowling with tennis balls and shot glasses. whatever you dont knock down after 2 rolls, you drink.
i love that he's uncircumcised. it makes handjobs so much easier. it's the lazy susan of penises.
He's pole dancing on a heat lamp.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
I offered to buy ihop waffles for all the homeless people outside the metro. It was time to go to bed.
he forgot we were at my place and not his so he tried kicking me out of my own apartment by saying "so, you can go whenever you want...."
Terrible hangover + phoenix airport + pizza hut....I think I might have entered one of the levels of hell.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
My poor liver. I drank enough on NYE to sustain an alcohol addiction for the entirety of 2015.
Morning fuck and a coffee. ARE YOU READY TO CONQUER THE GALAXY WITH ME??
My boss and I ended up at the same strip club. We both got lap dances while talking about work.
Sorry I didn’t really get to say goodbye last night I was busy vomiting in your fathers front yard
Someone threw up pink in the shower, there's a golf cart tipped over on the lawn and Cousin Brian is missing. What could Friday night throw at us?
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