I think she heard me call her a fat skank. But she was to be fair.
How can people commit suicide when things like bagels exist
Nothing like a little anal leakage to start off Sunday morning. Can't decide if that speaks well of my weekend or not...
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Single handedly the worst sex I've ever had just went down. Its like we both laid there after word-less thinking about the other " could they be any worse in bed" ?
also, I just found three random bruises on my knee. probably from when I was velcrod to the stairs
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
WHY AM I ALWAYS THE ASSHOLE WHO BREAKS OUT THE SHOTS
How many vodka infused gummi bears count as 1 drink?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I just don't do feelings in the summer months.
I will never understand why the dress to get laid party is always scheduled to be during family weekend. Its not even ironically funny.
did you come by the house last night? I found a half eaten corn dog in the mail box.. I just figured you were drunk and needed somewhere to crash, but your no where to be found. I'll I have is this corn dog. call me when you get this. I'm worried! --mom
you slapped the bag of goldfish out of her hands and screamed, "BITCH THIS AINT NO AQUARIUM". That's how fucked up
My ass is underappreciated
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