So when does "going out for one drink" = giving some guy an HJ on the sidewalk?!?
just woke up to a 10 min voicemail of you singing "99 red ballons".... you need to work on your german..
You broke out your mechano set and told us you were gonna "build us a beer machine" and 5 min later you were fast asleep
Well regardless of which drugs we choose to do tonight until four in the morning, we are having a wii bowling championship. So choose carefully.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
All i remember is Liz dragging me home yelling at me, crying, and barfing
Yes. Yes. Double yes. I'll bring the tits. You bring the frosting.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Literally just had a girl put her street name into my phone. Yeah.
& I just realized there is no vomit smiley. There needs to be a vomit smiley
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Ugh a 13 year old just asked me why people drink, I had to explain it without making it sound good. I need a drink.
I never saw such an emotional argument over yellow vs. spicy mustard.
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
I wish more of my problems were easily solvable by taking a good long shit.
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
HE IS. YOU SHOULD TOUCH HIS BACK.
IT IS A COURTSHIP RITUAL.
THE MUTUAL BUTT TOUCH IS SACRED.
Randomize