I swear coke makes your nose hairs grow out of control
i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
in the 'for' section of the check i put "when we got drunk and broke things". again im sorry.
and my loofah got caught on my nipple ring in the shower today. what an awful experience.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
im about 40 per cent sure i invited the bouncer to our pajama party next weekend...
we're stoned watching those roller coaster simulators w our hands up screaming on our couch
he made me feel like a shish kabob. his dick was the skewer.
and you said he wasn't worth calling.
What? My family got wasted on patron and I threw up on my pants and said it was gravy. Hot mess.
There is a doctor sitting next to me at lunch talking about the engorged scrotum surgery he did this morning and I am about to lose my professional grown adult facade.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Come on, what straight woman, gay man, or bi person HASN'T scrolled through Justin Trudeau pictures after a bad day?
You spent the entire night trying to catch pigeons and hugged a homeless guy and then gave him a pregnancy test.
By the end of our first date my penis was pierced.
I forget, are we banging TA’s for grades this semester or not?
Depends on how cute he is
I have all the porn. Be there soon
Who is this?
I almost suffocated in that mask but she kept calling me Jeremy so I kept it on.
Randomize