good penises are hard to come by.... must be the economy...
He has that cheese in a can and he's eating it. I have never seen that outside a goofy movie.
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
Not sure if jager bombs can cure tuberculosis, but its a theory im testing as we speak
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
There's no point in calling it Big Titties Tuesday if girls with big tits don't get anything special
I'm calling in my "fuck at anytime anywhere" card. Meet me at my place in 20 min, wear your Waldo costume.
Hungover playing piano at a baptism I am the PICTURE of class I feel like I should be struck by lightning
I snapchatted him nudes and he didn't screenshot a single one of them because he's a gentleman.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Watching Rudolph while stoned is practically a religious experience.
Tried to shave my legs but the rug burn on my knees from last night got in the way.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I'm not in it for just the sex. If I wanted mediocre dick once a week I would have stayed with one of my exes.
But on the bright side the arresting officer was just as hot as I remember and I took a pretty okay mugshot.
But what is a man profited, if he should gain Joe Biden and lose Alex Trebek?
Randomize