Texts From Last Night · cdunkman's Favorites

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cdunkman's Favorites Texts:

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(850): View more from Florida

Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.

Fav 17 8381 1454
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(303): View more from Colorado

If we were unicorns we would fly together. Like in a pack. A pack of flying unicorns.

Fav 56 14263 1986
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(513): View more from Ohio

You weren't lying about those ceramics students giving the best hand jobs.

Fav 35 9015 1971
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(845): View more from New York

The cab driver referred to me as his little gumdrop, im sure he won't feel the same when he sees the vomit all over his floor.

Fav 5 4143 1727
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Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Read it at the TFLN blog
(415): View more from California

It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.

Fav 19 6278 1731
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(865): View more from Tennessee

Since when does a beard not count as proof of age at the liquor store?

Fav 24 6213 1969
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(613): View more from Ontario

It snowed today. The whore-inducing weather is official over.

Fav 9 1331 3635
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(206): View more from Washington

And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny

Fav 17 6900 1469
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