did you get engaged???
I'll listen to your side of the story when you stop being such a whore.
you never know when you'll meet the man of your dreams and bang him in an elevator
So, right as I'm cumming, I pull out and go "PYEW PYEW" like Star Wars lasers. Best part is, I missed her completely.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
I know i'm the slutty cousin, but be honest. have you ever got your nose ring caught on a guy's zipper?
When I like her vacation photos, it really means "Im sleeping with your boyfriend." wonder if she will make the connection.
Help. Me. He just whispered 'prepare yourself', & sprayed hairspray everywheres to make sure the 'air was crisp'
There is a newly found video on my phone of me following you to the bathroom to watch you throw up. sorry I didn't hold your hair
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Accidentally gagged on my toothbrush and puked up a Walgreen's cheeseburger. 1) I am not going to be on top of my game tonight. 2) Since when do I have a gag reflex? 3) Walgreen's cheeseburgers are awesome.
Seeing your one night stand on campus never gets less awkward. Why is Subway the only good place to eat?
Volunteering at a homeless shelter a bum asked if he could lick me cause I still reeked of whiskey. Being a bumsickle=epic hangover
She's really sweet and cute, but when she drinks, she becomes way too proud of her bush.
There's no good way to say, "sorry your son saw me naked on top of your brother"
No, it's okay that he's on a date. I attach no more emotion to him than I do my vibrator.
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