I'm not a mortal combat character
but my vagina is
Update, blind date is cute and fun.
Scratch that, blind date just threw up.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
his dick got so hard in his pants and it broke his zipper
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just found out its our ciliated mucous membrane that traps the molly when we snort it. Biology does relate to life
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
Everything gets a little fuzzy after the flats of jello shots, but I do have a vague recollection of being at the top of a large human pyramid
You tried taking his shirt off at the bar. He was 37 and married with kids.
Be ready for a dog pile. On your head. With my ass.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
"It's not a date, we're just spending the entire day at a concert and then getting high together." Awesome.
You have found the Promised Land of friend zones
I need to buy fuckboy repellant for whenever I think it's a good idea to meet boys I found in tinder
I have put on lipstick and signed up for class. Nothing more shall be expected of me today.
I AM SMARTER THAN EVERY FUCKBOY WHO HAS EVER SWIPED LEFT ON ME
Mmm vodka always tastes better when i know i have work at 8am
He just sent me a picture of multiple chickens eating in his kitchen... should I be worried
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