btw, your gf is going to want to talk to you today...and consequently you're probably not going to want to talk to me...just a heads up
my mom just asked me why she found a half-eaten burrito in the hamper
I'm in new territory... I've never had to convince a guy to let me give him head as an apology.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
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He brought Stephanie home from the black light party. Apparently he has night vision beer goggles
Did he make you just lay your head next to his cock and talk to it again?
It can't be good... The last recollection I have is singing lullabys to his penis
Yeah we can't find him. He left a note saying he left and isn't that drunk with what appears to be an attempt at the quadratic formula for proof. He also wrote down his number and left his phone by the note
like he said he was barking at you while cumming in your face
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of course! give me a few hours to recover from chugging a 4loko out of a frisbee, and it will be rage time yet again
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
Halfway through lecture, some kid in the front row threw up IN his hands. Professor held the door for him to carry it out.
Guess I was throwing darts at a patrons head last night, lol! Black out
I'll be in SoCal at my bachelorette party, aka embracing a fireman covered in KY and chocolate shavings.
No one understands the complete and utter debilitating 3 day bday bender.
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