I look better un-naked...
if i get the "i'm engaged" text one more time, i'm going to shoot myself in the face so my cats won't eat it when i die alone.
Exactly. I don't do penetration on the first date. Blowjobs however are perfectly acceptable.
I encourage the greeting beej. It determines if the dick is worth keeping around.
Everytime I cough, my tampon falls out a little bit. Does this mean I'm loose?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
UD be completely fine. you don't lose control just keep a positive environment. for example i really want to lick the wall cause red is delicious but i don't have to.
All the girls at the party had American flag thongs on... Pretty impressed with coordination seeing as how impromptu this event was
Its ok. Im having a low day. About to mix cake mix with milk and drink it.
They need to leave so I can start drinking shamefully.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He was my first. He knew. He knew right there I was wrapped around his penis.
In 2014 only three boys have seen my boobs so far
I found a video on my phone from last night... You got up on the table at McDonald's and screamed BURRITOOO!
THE AUSTRALIAN IS SINGLE AS FUCK.
In the officer's defense, I was indeed pantless at the time he cuffed me, but there's a perfectly good explanation.
My life just got so pathetic that I volunteered to work a double on my day off because its saturday and I have nothing else planned
Randomize