Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
I have a story that starts with Nutella and ends with sex in the laundry building at RIT.
I'm quitting my job and I'm just going to become a professional drunk girls mistake.
If I knew losing weight would mean this many fucking creepers I would've just stayed fat.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he offered to walk down from the bar this morning to my house and bring me a guinness...
how romantic. its the irish mans version of flowers
then out of nowhere we heard a voice yell "Fuck that pussy!"
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
oh god was she eating orange peels again
It looks like sephora exploded on his dick, so i assumed I was the second girl that gave him head that night.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I feel like delivery guys should know that when you order lunch for one and answer the door wearing sweatpants, there's no need to say "Happy Valentine's Day."
You kept challenging people to a cartwheel contest...when someone finally agreed, you cartwheeled into some chicks face, then tried to propose to her as an apology. Fyi, she said no
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
Mmhmmm. I have a list of drunk achievement that is almost as long as my list of stoned achievements
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
He walked in wearing nothing but a WWF belt and yelled "THE CHAMP... IS... HEEERE!!!"
Randomize