remind me to tell you about the ham sandwich empire im building
Why would you say my penis is small in front of so many people?
Being a girl sucks.
Being a boyfriend sucks for about a week, too
Manscaping on you would be like trying to clean up the oil spill with a dixie cup.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Too long to explain. Basically I started an electircal fire. No one was hurt except for a box of cereal near the outlet.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
If you are wondering why there is half eaten pizza in your pocket it's because you were passed out with it in your hand in my bathtub. Today's your b-day and thought I'd give you a good idea about what happened last night as a present
foreskin is a definite game changer
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'll explain later but basically I was feeling dangerous, I'm dressed as Ann Romney and Ann Romney is a bad bitch.
I'm beginning to think the entirety of my appeal is due to the size of my ass.
Is it socially acceptable to break up with someone over snapchat?
The spirit of America is being too hungover to celebrate America right?
Your Vodka Saturday privileges have been reduced to Beer until you go a full month without losing an article of clothing.
He’s 48, has a Prince Albert piercing and a white Range Rover
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