Wow, your whole life is a joke regardless of the fact that its april fools day
You don't give head? I'm offended and I don't even have a cock...
nothing can go wrong this weekend. $1500 to spend. i have options for hookups every night. my backup plans have backup plans
I'm like a warm blanket that has sex with you
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Before I left in the morning I deleted her purity ring app off her iPod, I figured it would save her the shame
You tipped the bathroom lady $20 and then yelled "IT'S YOUR LUCKY DAAAAAAAY" at her.
She just face-timed her mom and had her watch all of us toast to her grandmas tits..
I just want you to know that I hid the weed. Once you find another job, I'll tell you where it is. Happy Hunting, bro.
I wish we couldve been like jesus and the desiples tongith
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
No, he's ok. He just broke his teeth on the stripper pole. No biggie.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I'm taking a leave of absence and sending myself to fat camp. I'll let you know when I'm out.
Have you ever realized how cool bread is? Like so many things taste good on it. Like its crazy to think that peanut butter and turkey can both taste good on the same thing.
Halfway through she said I was exactly like she imagined. So many things have been stroked this night.
Randomize